Thursday, August 26, 2010

The Good and The Bad

I haven't been writing lately as so many things have happened that I have had to deal with. Some good, some bad.  I am strong, but for a while there, I wasn't sure I could stand.  Finding out that the beast was back was a shock to my system.   I really believed the results would not be melanoma.  I couldn't deal with it while in the hospital as I was on too may drugs, so I was numb.  Everything hit once I was home. Then I found out a friend of mine died and my mom left.  It has been a rough few weeks, but I am moving forward.  Baby steps for now, but soon they'll be big dinosaur steps.

My mom left this past Sunday.  That was a hard day.  There was a hole in my chest that lasted til morning.  Then it wasn't gone, but eased to an ache.  Her support while she was here was amazing and I don't just mean all the things she took care of: cooking, cleaning, watching Teya, etc.  She was there for me emotionally when I really needed it and it meant the world to me. Thanks Mom!

A day after my surgery, I suffered a great loss.  A melanoma warrior, my friend Pete, lost his battle.  He was a great man and someone who gave me loads of support.  He was passionate for life and living each day to it's fullest.  He was always level headed and optimistic.  He was there in celebration for the good and helped me through many dark days.  I miss him.

Here is some good to end this post on a lighter note. Had an appointment with my Kidney Surgeon last week and he said that everything was healing nicely.  Told me to be active, but cautious.  No heavy lifting or anything strenuous.  Just listen to my body and not go beyond it's limits.  So, I've been resting and healing for the past weeks and I am getting better. Each day I wake my body feels better. The recovery road is a rocky one, but I'm making my way. I can drive and spend my days off the couch which is great! By the end of the day I'm beat and sore, but it is great to be moving.

As for my next step, I have an appointment with Dr. Hersh in Tucson at Univ of AZ on Monday (8/30). I'm looking forward to this appointment to receive direction and treatment options.

My next post will be about the good.  I got all the bad out, so now I can concentrate on the good things.  It is good to air out the bad to make room for the good.  As my yoga instructor says, breathe in the good and out the bad. 


Anonymous said...

Stay strong. You are near the best centers to help. Cutting it out is the best thing for MM. Many people follow your blog and it keeps us strong. Know you are doing good by writing-we log on to see how you are doing each day :)You have a lot of people pulling for you out there in blog land!

Anonymous said...

Hey girl Mom hear, as a mom I can never do or say enough. But one thing is for sure I love you tons and miss not being with you. You are very, very strong and life threw you a loop but you where always good at wholahooping so this is nothing for you my girl. Stay strong and fight hard. What, what am I saying this is Tina right. Oh yeah she's a really strong fighter. love ya

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend, Pete. You are a tremendous inspiration, and if he was an inspiration to you, he must have been pretty amazing.

Keep fighting the fight. In addition to your wonderful family and friends, you have people pulling for you who you don't even know. Lots of positive thoughts coming your way.

Anonymous said...

Glad to hear you're feeling better, bit by bit! And here's to enjoying the trip to and back from Tucson!