I haven't been writing lately as so many things have happened that I have had to deal with. Some good, some bad. I am strong, but for a while there, I wasn't sure I could stand. Finding out that the beast was back was a shock to my system. I really believed the results would not be melanoma. I couldn't deal with it while in the hospital as I was on too may drugs, so I was numb. Everything hit once I was home. Then I found out a friend of mine died and my mom left. It has been a rough few weeks, but I am moving forward. Baby steps for now, but soon they'll be big dinosaur steps.
My mom left this past Sunday. That was a hard day. There was a hole in my chest that lasted til morning. Then it wasn't gone, but eased to an ache. Her support while she was here was amazing and I don't just mean all the things she took care of: cooking, cleaning, watching Teya, etc. She was there for me emotionally when I really needed it and it meant the world to me. Thanks Mom!
A day after my surgery, I suffered a great loss. A melanoma warrior, my friend Pete, lost his battle. He was a great man and someone who gave me loads of support. He was passionate for life and living each day to it's fullest. He was always level headed and optimistic. He was there in celebration for the good and helped me through many dark days. I miss him.
Here is some good to end this post on a lighter note. Had an appointment with my Kidney Surgeon last week and he said that everything was healing nicely. Told me to be active, but cautious. No heavy lifting or anything strenuous. Just listen to my body and not go beyond it's limits. So, I've been resting and healing for the past weeks and I am getting better. Each day I wake my body feels better. The recovery road is a rocky one, but I'm making my way. I can drive and spend my days off the couch which is great! By the end of the day I'm beat and sore, but it is great to be moving.
As for my next step, I have an appointment with Dr. Hersh in Tucson at Univ of AZ on Monday (8/30). I'm looking forward to this appointment to receive direction and treatment options.
My next post will be about the good. I got all the bad out, so now I can concentrate on the good things. It is good to air out the bad to make room for the good. As my yoga instructor says, breathe in the good and out the bad.